PART SIX

No. 6: You deserve someone better.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, draping her arm closer around my stomach. "I didn't mean to freak you out like that."

"It's okay," I smiled, kissing the top of her head gently. "I just wish you'd tell me what's bothering you so much."

Her face was bathed in moonlight, allowing me to see the deep frown that crossed across her forehead. She sighed softly and sat up, grabbing her tank top from the floor and pulling it on.

"Autumn?" I asked, frowning slightly as I sat up, the sheets still covering the lower part of my naked body.

She turned around to face me again, guilt playing in her eyes. "Do you know what it's like to love more than one person at the same time?" she asked quietly. "Knowing that whatever you do, whoever you're with and no matter how happy you are, some part of you is always hurting because you can't be with the other person as well?"

I swallowed hard, praying silently that this wasn't the end just yet. Maybe I should just play innocent and see if she decided to tell me. "What are you saying?" I asked slowly, tilting my head ever so slightly.

Her lower lip began quivering and she reached over to brush my cheek lovingly. "Just that I love you," she croaked, smiling warmly. "No matter what happens, or … if you find out I'm not the person you thought I was, I just … I just want you to know that I love you."

I leaned into her touch, closing my eyes to savor the sensation I had running through my body. "Promise?" I whispered with a shaky voice, opening my eyes to meet her gaze again.

A lonely tear trickled down her cheek as she smiled softly. "Promise."

I leaned over and kissed her cheek, catching the salty teardrop before it faded away. Then I moved to her lips and kissed her deeply, smiling softly when I felt her arms lace around my neck again.

She really did need me.

She laughed softly into my lips, pulling slightly away to catch her breath. "Come on," she smiled, pulling me up to my feet and dragging me out on the floor.

"What are you doing?" I asked, amusement playing in my voice.

"Just wait there for a second," she said and jogged over to the radio that stood on the mahogany dresser. She scanned the stations until a wide smile filled her full lips. "Much better," she grinned and walked up to me, draping her arms carelessly over my shoulders.

I laughed softly when the sound of a sweet slow song filled the dark room. "You're crazy, you know that?"

"Crazy about you," she smiled and rubbed her nose against mine. "Just humor me, Littrell."

Smiling lightly, I wrapped my arms around her waist and we began dancing slowly, intimately, not moving from our spot on the floor. I buried my head in the crook of her neck, relishing in the sweet smell that always hung around her.

She was my Autumn again, if only just for a moment. If only just for one song.

Would you dance
If I asked you to dance?
Would you run
And never look back?
Would you cry
If you saw me crying?
Would you save my soul, tonight?

I lifted my head and sang softly into her ear, pulling her as close to me as she could possibly get.

That night, at that moment, that song was the closest way I could get to tell her everything I was feeling.

"Would you tremble
if I touched your lips?
Would you laugh?
Oh please tell me this.
Now would you die
For the one you love?
Hold me in your arms, tonight."

"Keep singing," she whispered softly, tightening her grip around my neck. "I love feeling this close to you."

Feeling a lump form in my throat, I forced my voice to sound normal as I sang the chorus just as softly, meaning every word more than I had ever meant anything else.

"I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away."

She lifted her head from my shoulder and looked at me, her eyes darker and deeper than ever before. "What am I gonna do about you?" she whispered, a warm smile playing on her lips. "Just when I thought I couldn't fall harder for you, you go and do something like this."

I swallowed hard and offered her a small smile, kissing the tip of her nose. "I love you, sweetheart," I said quietly, my words bouncing off the thick walls.

She kissed my lips lightly and pressed her forehead against mine, not tearing her gaze away. "I love you more."

Would you swear
That you'll always be mine?
Or would you lie?
Would you run and hide?
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care…
You're here tonight.

That night changed me. Maybe not in a way for anyone else to notice, but I knew I was a different man from then on. Some might call me melodramatic or self-delusional and try to knock some common sense into my head for thinking that way. Some might call me crazy for thinking that for just one moment, I could feel her love so intensely that I cried myself to sleep that night. Cried happy tears.

But you know what?

I don't give a damn what they think.

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Chapter 05 » Chapter 07