PART TWENTY

*Howie*

I looked up from my meal to glance at Melody for quite possibly the hundredth time tonight. She'd been very quiet for quite some time now, keeping herself occupied by pricking at the remains of food on her plate as the expression in her eyes kept growing more distant.

I frowned slightly, even though deep down I knew what was wrong with her. I was gonna start this conversation sooner of later anyway, I had just hoped I could've waited till after we'd left the restaurant.

But maybe now was the right time.

"Melody, is something wrong?" I asked concerned. "You seem to be a million miles away."

She looked up and placed her fork back on the table with a sigh. "I'm so sorry, Howie," she apologized. "I guess I'm not very good company tonight."

"No, it's not that. But if there's something wrong, you would tell me, right?" I asked and placed my elbows on the table.

She bit her lower lip nervously and did her best to look everywhere else but into my eyes. "Well ... there's something I have to tell you," she then said. "I've had a great time tonight, believe me when I say that. But ... I think it will be wrong of me if I don't tell you that-"

"That you're in love with AJ?"

Her head shot up and her eyes were wide when she asked, "What? How did you-?"

"Kevin told me," I said softly. Now it was my turn to look down and away from her shocked expression.

"He what?!" she exclaimed, struggling to keep her voice down. "I can't believe this. He had no right to do that!"

"Melody, please," I said softly and took her hand in mine. "I know this all seems confusing, but if you'll just hear me out, I can explain."

She looked at my hand on top of hers with a hesitant look in her eyes. "Fine," she said and leaned back in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest. "This gotta be good."

I sighed deeply and ran a hand through my hair. "Well," I said softly. "I know for a fact that Kevin would never have told me if the circumstances had been different. But I came up to him a few days ago and-"

I paused for a moment and struggled to gather all the courage I had to look her in the eye. "And told him that I had feelings for you," I said softly. "And ... I don't know, I guess he told me because he didn't want me to be lead on."

If it was even possible, Melody looked more confused than before. "But I don't understand," she said. "If you knew about my feelings for AJ, why did you ask me out?"

This was the hard part. I cleared my throat and replied, "Well ... the thing is, AJ is kinda hard to read these days. So we made sure that he heard that I'd asked you out to see what his reaction would be and-"

"Stop," Melody suddenly said and held her hand up to silence me. "Stop right there." Her eyes were clear to read when she leaned in closer and said, "You're telling me that the only reason you asked me out was to pull some kind of prank on AJ?"

"What? No, I-"

"This was all pretend, wasn't it?" she asked and threw her napkin on the table. "I should've known. Of course it was."

"Melody, no," I said firmly. "It was never pretend. Never. Do you hear me?"

She looked up again and I saw her eyes clouding up with unshed tears. God, this was unbearable. "Listen to me," I said softly and scooted my chair a little closer so I could reach her. "I really do like you," I whispered and gently wiped the lonely tear on her cheek away. "And I want to get to know you better. But I realize how strong your feelings for AJ are and I'm not gonna attempt to stand between you two. I just wanted to see what intentions AJ might've had."

She closed her eyes and a few more tears trickled down her cheeks. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I took advantage of you tonight. I should've just-"

"No you didn't," I said gently and smiled. "You didn't. I'm just honored you even wanted to go out with me in the first place."

"You're honored?" she asked disbelieving. "No, I should be the one. You're such a good man, Howie, with such pure intentions."

"Give yourself some credit, Melody," I smiled and placed my hand above hers.

Her eyes finally locked with mine and she smiled meekly. "God, look at me," she said and chuckled softly through her tears. "I can't believe I'm bawling my eyes out in the middle of the most expensive restaurant in town."

"No one's gonna know," I said softly and handed her a napkin. She gratefully accepted it and quickly wiped her cheeks of the moist. When she looked at me again, I quietly said, "I'm sorry."

She shook her head and sent me a half smile. "Don't be. You meant well."

"Not really," I said and looked down again. "I guess I was hoping I could change your mind if you went out with me tonight. It was stupid really, I'm sorry I dragged you along."

A brief moment passed by where all I could hear was a couple laughing a few tables away from us. Then I felt her index finger under my chin, gently pushing it upwards so my eyes locked with hers again. She smiled softly and leaned closer till her lips brushed mine in a soft kiss. I responded and gently placed my hand on her cheek, savouring the feeling her lips brought me.

Then she pulled slightly away and said, "You're incredible. Some girl's gonna be very lucky to have you someday."

"Some girl," I repeated quietly and looked down to my hands. Some girl. Meaning not Melody. Of course I'd already known that, there was no reason to be disappointed. But at that moment I just couldn't look her in the eye, afraid of what my own would reveal to her.

"I wish I could change the way I feel, Howie," she said softly. "I just ... can't help it."

"I know," I nodded and smiled halfheartedly. "I wouldn't expect you to. I just hope AJ knows what a lucky guy he is."

Her smile faded and she looked down again. "AJ barely knows I exist," she whispered sadly.

"That's not true," I objected. "He's crazy about you."

"No, he's not," she smiled halfheartedly and shook her head. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, but-"

"I'm not trying to do anything," I said firmly and lifted her chin so she couldn't look away from me. "I'm telling you the truth," I said. "Listen, I've known AJ for a long time, and just to see the way he looks at you ... Melody, it says it all. Even you can't deny that."

"I don't see anything," she said, her voice pitching ever so slightly. "All I see is him being wrapped up in his beautiful girlfriend. It breaks my heart every time I have to see them play the lovey-dovey couple."

"You know what breaks my heart?" I asked as I gently caressed her cheek. "To see you in so much pain over something that's not even there. Just look at him, Melody. You'll see the same thing I do."

"All I see in his eyes is pity," she said and her lower lip started to quiver. "And it hurts so damn much. Dammit, why did I have to fall for him? He does nothing but hurt me over and over again."

"I wish I could tell you," I said softly. "But nonetheless, you did. And you couldn't have picked a better person. Believe me, I know from experience."

She sniffled slightly and smiled. "I'm really sorry, I completely spoiled the evening," she said quietly and grabbed the napkin again to dry her cheeks.

"I'm the one that ruined it," I said and shook my head. "We haven't really gotten to talk in a while and I wanted to spend tonight just ... getting to know you again."

"I know we haven't talked much," she said and brushed my cheek gently. "And I'm so sorry about that. But you do know me, Howie, it's quite possible that you know me better than any of the others after tonight."

I smiled and took her hand again. "You have no idea how honored I am to hear you say that," I said and stroke the back of her hand with my thumb. "But you know, there's still time to save the evening."

"Really?" she asked. "What did you have in mind?"

"How would you like to take a walk?" I asked and grinned widely. "I know a great place nearby."

"Oh?" she questioned. "Yeah, I'd like that. It'll be nice to stretch my legs a little."

"So ... friends?" I asked and extended my hand questioningly.

She grinned at me and accepted my handshake. "Friends," she agreed with a nod.

"Great," I smiled and signalled a waiter to give us the check.

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We spent another hour walking along the beach, watching the waves rush into the sand. Under different circumstances, it would've been very romantic. But we were too busy talking and having fun to notice that. Well ... maybe I did a few times, but I didn't say anything. I didn't wanna risk screwing things up again. Telling her about our plan to make AJ jealous had almost pushed her away from all of us, there was no way I was gonna let that happen again. For my own sake as well as everyone else's.

When I'd driven her home, I walked her up to her apartment ... you know, just to make sure she got there okay.

"Do you wanna come inside?" she asked as she unlocked her door.

I raised an eyebrow surprised.

"For a drink," she chuckled and smacked my arm playfully. "Get your mind out of the gutter, D."

"Sorry," I grinned. "Well, as tempting as it sounds, I'm gonna have to pass. I have to get up early tomorrow and do some press conferences."

"I know," she smiled. "I'll be watching from here."

"Oh ... that reminds me," I said hesitantly and began shifting my weight from one foot to another. "Next Saturday, our record company is having this party for all their signed performers. It's a pretty formal thing, and ... well, we were all just wondering if you wanted to come with us?"

"Wow, that's flattering," she said, obviously surprised. "I'd love to. It sounds like a lot of fun. But you said formal, right?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "We have to do the whole suit and tie thing."

"I can't wait to see that," she grinned. "All right, I'll see what I can dig out of my closet."

"Great, it's a date then."

She stood silent for a moment, biting her lower lip like she always did when she was nervous. "Will you promise something?" she asked quietly.

"Sure."

"That we're not gonna come to work on Monday feeling all awkward," she said as she tucked a few strands of stray hair behind her ears. "What happened, happened. I hope it's not gonna change anything."

I wrapped my arms gently around her waist and kissed her forehead affectionately. "Of course not," I said quietly and smiled. "No hard feelings, okay? I had a great time tonight."

"So did I," she smiled and wrapped me in a close hug. "Don't forget what I said," she whispered into my ear. "Some girl is gonna be very lucky to have you someday."

I pulled away ever so slightly, still with my arms around her waist. "I won't," I said and placed my index finger under her chin. "Keep your head up, all right? And just give it time."

She nodded solemnly and kissed my cheek. "Goodnight, Howie," she smiled softly and entered her apartment, closing the door behind her.

"Goodnight, Melody," I whispered and sighed deeply as I ran a hand through my hair. After standing in her hallway for a brief moment, I turned around and walked down the stairs with heavy paces. With my hands buried deep in my pockets, I stepped into the cold night and closed my eyes, allowing the wind to clear my head of all the emotions that ran through me.

AJ doesn't know how lucky he is, I thought bitterly and began walking down the street. Damn him for being so blind. She doesn't deserve that kind of treatment.

But at least I'd taken my chance, even though it had failed miserably. And no matter how disappointed I felt right now, I knew I'd done the right thing by telling her. She needed to know that she was just as easy to fall for as any other girl on the planet. Hopefully it would strengthen her confidence and make AJ open his eyes for what was right in front of him.

"It would be about time," I whispered softly. If I had to see that heartbroken look on her face again because of him, I didn't know what I'd do.

I stepped into my car and slammed the door shut loudly. Time to go home to an empty house with no one to greet me. God, my life sucked.

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Chapter 19 » Chapter 21